Color Me Suspicious

First of all, I want you to know that I really did move on from any kind of analysis of news-maker fashion choices as political signals. I wanted to close the door on the Hillary era here and just get on with it. But ladies and gentlemen - what I'm seeing here can't be ignored.

First, a little pre-test to establish the baseline understanding. Rate the following Democrats in order of the magnitude of their power and influence:

• Barack Obama
• Nancy Pelosi
• Hillary Clinton

Ok, now consider this: pearls.

The internets are full of Michelle O - Jackie O comparisons. That, of course, is bullshit. Don't even get me started - let's stick to the pearls for now. The talk is all about how MO is doing the traditional first lady pearl thing  but doing it her own way - everything from a pearl-trimmed afro-pick to those god-awful brooches she likes.

I came across this piece at one of my daily reads All The Rage, in which the image staff of the  LA Times "muses on the culture of keeping up appearances""

 "If you thought pearls left the White House with Barbara Bush, think again. Kenneth Jay Lane, the king of costume jewelry, counts former first ladies Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, Nancy Regan, Barbara Bush (she wore a strand of white, faux KJL pearls to one of her husband’s inaugurations) and Hillary Clinton as clients. And Lane is dropping a strand of colorful, faux pearls into the gift bags at the Creative coalition's Gala and Inaugural Ball."

And who should show up wearing something remarkably similar at her highest profile appearance in two years?

Oh yeah! It's our best girl, Hillary Rodham, accompanied by a section of Mt Rushmore as she appears in what is very likely the first in a series of high-visibility throw-downs. We'll soon see who's the real "first" lady, won't we? But, ho! What have we here?

 

Well, bless my soul if it isn't Nanny Pee at the opening of Congress last week! And look at that necklace. But wait there's more:

  

Here she is looking all smooth if somewhat asymmetrical at the opening of Congress in January 2008. She's sporting big multi-colored pearls as well as those remarkable sundowner boobs of hers.

And in 2006! (One word, Nanny: roots.) I think there's some kind of message about real political power and enduring influence here but I don't have it quite all together yet.

Now to confuse the issue even more, check this out: "QVC will be selling the same Kenneth Jay Lane pearl necklace during their live broadcast from the Creative Coalition’s inaugural event."

Um hmm. QVC. Remember back during the primaries when HRC got a big donation from Barry Diller's wife and appeared immediately thereafter sporting a big old QVC Diamonique ring?

I'm telling you - something is going here in the Women of Political Power department and they're arrogant about it, too - the clues are too obvious. I don't quite know what it is yet, but it's not about anybody named Obama. That much I'm sure of.

Post test: now, knowing what you know, please re-rate these Democrats in order of the magnitude of their power and influence:

•  Barack Obama
•  Nancy Pelosi
•  Hillary Clinton

[Full Disclosure: I own the KJL triple-strand Barbara Bush faux pearls because OF COURSE I DO!  WHAT DID YOU EXPECT? I bought them from QVC.]

Comments

[Jim - PRS]

Makes me think of pop-beads. Whatever happened to them?

[tina]

adage:

Pearls bring tears.

No one in our family was allowed to wear them (unless they were the birthstone of that person) because of above.

[Mr. Bingley]

I think they were banned, Jim, because someone choked on them.

Think of the children!

[The Proprietor]

My God. This was all right in front of me the entire time, while I was frittering away my energy counting potential convention delegates, electoral votes, etc.

You have removed the scales from my eyes! (I'm sure that Organic Herbal Eye De-Scaler is available on QVC...)

I was getting ready to re-tool Last Chance Gas as a NJ political scandal sheet. Now, I'm not so sure if I have the right stuff.

[Tami]

I was at a tea party last Saturday, and one of the guests was wearing "snap pearls". It was just another name for pop beads.

Coincidence?

[Teresa]

Brilliant - absolutely brilliant reportage Suzette! You are remarkable in picking up on these things.

(I am a complete incompetent when it comes to jewelry - I know nothing about it and therefore I missed all these outright incredible clues!)

[bob]

We must remember that Jackie married Jack for the purpose of being Jack's [Roman Catholic] wife, & she decided where Lenny Bernstein would sit at State dinners when the maestro said his wife regretted that she would be unable to attend. Jackie's job was to know such things. No comparison with Michelle, who needs a social secretary to instruct her, whereas Jackie's secretary took instruction.