Flakes On A Plane

This Consumerist headline holds a lot of promise but it turns out to be merely an on-line poll instead of fully developed article.  I thought for a minute there that someone had adopted my idea but apparently the time has not yet arrived. Remarkably, at 7:30 am the poll results are:

Offer Family Friendly Flights?

3.6% (53 votes)

Offer Baby-Free Flights? 23.9% (352 votes)

Both. 29.1% (429 votes)

Everything is fine the way it is, people need to relax. 38.4% (566 votes)

This poll is missing a choice and I will complain about it in the comments. 5.0% (74 votes)

1474 total votes. results as of 07/13/2007 07:17:35 am.

Read that again and then answer my poll:
Who the heck are the people who agree that everything is fine the way it is? Never mind - I'll answer it myself: people who don't fly much, that's who.

Let me go over the main points of my program again:

• Offer Adults Only flights for $25.00 more per ticket
• Offer special children's Flights for 20.00 less per ticket, with a bigger discount for multiple children traveling together
• Have stewardesses dress as some kind of happy kid-friendly mascot (Nental the Continental Mascot, Uncle Ted  the United mascot, Delta Quirk the Delta mascot, Farmer Jane for Midwest, some kind of cowboy for Southwest, etc)
• Stock the Children's Planes with an assortment of formula bottles, diapers, juice boxes and low-sugar cereals
• Car seats already in place on Children's Flights.

The first two points are so that the airlines break even at first - later on when this concept catches fire, they can increase the prices on the kids flights. The last two points are designed to reduce the clog at security checkpoints, although they have the added benefit of freeing overhead bin space.

Anyway, thank you, Consumerist, for at least ushering this topic into the public discussion.

More on-topic discussion in the comments here.

Comments

[Dave]

How about this... Outlaw Corporate jets and private jets altogether under Green Laws and see how quickly changes are made when the "Big Boys" are forced to fly commercial.

[aithne]

Dave has the right idea there! I say this strategy would be good with many situations!

[pops]

Similar gripes are frequently heard about cruise ships. A year or so ago there were many offers of singles only/family free cruises and they withered and died on the vine.

You know, flights over either ocean are over international waters where technically no law applies. On any European bound flight that means you could offer kids booze.

[FKC]

Damn, I'm happy I don't fly!