If I was a woman related to presumptive president Obama, I'd be more than a little uneasy right about now. Let's play Try And Find Me:
Presumptive first lady Michelle Obama. They've got her buried so deep now even David Axelrod can't find her. I don't see why - she's so nice and all. I'm sure she didn't mean to stir up all that black vs. white stuff and the crack about being proud of this country for the first time - heck, what does that even mean? There's no harm to the campaign in letting the public see a little more of her.
Here she is coaching some ladies in the finer points of displaying the peaceful "hang loose" sign. We're all Hawaiian now! Look at this picture and you can almost see the gentle waggling motion. See what an inspiring leader she can be?
[Note to Michelle - you forgot to extend your thumb and pinky again. Needs more practice.]
We'll get our fill of looking at Michelle and her giant gaudy brooches after November 5th.
Suddenly ill grandma Madelyn Dunham. Dead or alive? Nobody knows! I guess the big rush to get to her bedside wasn't EXACTLY the urgent situation that was trumpeted around by the MSM after all.Who could have guessed that?
Don't bury her yet - her usefulness is quite not over. Unless Teddy K kicks the bucket before election day, the campaign strategists are going to have to go to Plan B to capture the sympathies of the Dead Elder voters.
[Note to Grandma - in case you make it that far, keep your doors locked on Tuesday.]
Grandma Madelyn will appear in national headlines again after November 5th (one way or the other).
lllegal alien Aunt Zeituni Onyango. That's how it goes, Auntie - one day your busy donating your welfare checks to your nephew's campaign and hiding from the INS and the next day, you're whisked out of sight and can't be found for all the lottery tickets in Boston. Senator Obama had no knowledge of your immigration status! Senator Obama returned the welfare money you donated!
Senator Obama believes we should take care of one another - hey, has anyone checked Greenwood Avenue in Chicago? I bet that's where she is. Senator Obama, once he "found out" about her, moved her out of run down public housing and into his spacious private home. What a sweet way to spread the wealth around! Plus free baby sitting.
[Note to Aunt Zeituni - here's your money back. Your nephew is going to have to limit himself to taking campaign donations from other foreigners now.]
Auntie Zeituni can't talk about her relationship with her newphew, the presidential contender, until after the election. She will resume media interviews on November 5th.
Mama Sarah Onyango Obama, the other grandmother. Barack Obama’s family in Kenya has stopped media interviews. "The move was taken to ensure that people, especially the media, do not pre-empt the outcome of the US elections by using comments from the family members."
"The move was taken to give Obama's paternal grandmother a break." Oh, that's more like it. Security officers are restricting entry into the family home. Visitors are thoroughly screened by police before being allowed in and restrained from conducting interviews.
I know just what they mean - my grandma was the same way. All day long it was the same thing - restraining, screening and restricting from morning till night. I tell you, those grandmas need a lot of handling to keep things running smooth.
[Note to Mama Sarah - just clam up and don't pre-empt the outcome of the US elec ... wait a minute. Just what could you possibly say that would have that effect? Don't get wise on us now- you know what we have planned for grandma Madelyn. Ever heard of a little thing called Plan C?]
The family will open up to the media again on November 5th.